5 Communication Mistakes Hurting Your Relationship
Want a happier, healthier relationship?
How you communicate has such a big impact on your relationship. Strong communication skills can bring you closer together as you get a better understanding of your partner's wants, needs, and inner workings. On the other hand, poor communication skills increase conflict, resentment, and dissatisfaction.
The good news? Communication is a skill. And like any other skill, it is something you can learn with a little education and practice.
My clients often find it easier to focus on what not to do when they're first getting started with improving their communication skills. If you're doing any of these 5 things, it's probably time you start working on your communication skills.
5 Common Communication Mistakes
Jumping right to the point - it's important that you pick a good time to talk. You don't want to bring up an issue after a long day at work or while your partner is in the middle of something. Spend a minute or two thinking about how your partner will receive the information. You may even want to ask something like, "is now a good time for us to talk?".
Fighting in the bedroom - the bedroom should be a conflict-free zone. If you can, try your best to keep work, screens, and fights out of the bedroom. If you have something important you want to talk about, try the couch or dinner table instead.
Expecting your partner to read your mind - as much as we all wish they could, it is impossible for your partner to read your mind. Even if you've been together for a long time. If you want something, you're going to have to ask for it. Asking for more support, small gifts, or quality time does not make it any less valuable.
Not setting boundaries - setting boundaries is so important. Boundaries within relationships create a safe space of knowing what is best for yourself and identifying that the other person is also responsible for their emotions and choices. Healthy boundaries improve a relationship and a lack of boundaries leads to fights and resentment. Not sure how to set a boundary? Check out my 4 step formula to setting boundaries on Instagram. For more boundary support, check out these books.
Staying quiet about the good stuff - it's so easy to get caught up in giving feedback when you're trying to improve your relationship. But it is equally, if not more important, to spend time talking about what's going really well. Acknowledge the good stuff out loud to your partner. It will help your partner to do more of what you like - and they won't feel attacked or defeated when you tell them what you want to change.
If you're asking yourself, "so what should I be doing then???" this post from my Instagram might help - just click the picture to swipe through!
Remember: this post is for informational purposes only and may not be the best fit for you and your personal situation. It shall not be construed as legal, financial, or medical advice. The information and education provided here is not intended or implied to supplement or replace professional advice of your own attorney, accountant, physician, or financial advisor. Always check with your own physician, attorney, financial advisor, accountant, or other business or medical professional before trying or implementing any information read here.
